Discipline Tools

Discipline: something one have to do but actually hate to do!

I find this most challenging as a parent, to discipline my 3 year old. It is as if nothing really works for her, spanking is not something I believe in, and it does not work on her in any case! (yes, guilty, we did try that).

 I've found this idea, Happy/Sad bottles where you have 2 bottles, one with a happy face and one with a sad face. The idea is to get(or keep) all the balls in the happy face bottle, by obeying and keep mommy/ daddy happy, but if you are naughty/don't listen/hurt your sibling etc, you make mommy sad (note the word sad and not angry), so your balls will move to the sad bottle. If we come to the end of the day and all the balls are in the happy face bottle you will get a surprise tomorrow. This is a redeemable method so that the child can be "better" again after being naughty and does not have to feel it's all over now. Also it forces mom to see positive behaviour and not hammer only on the negative behaviour. 

This is actually working like a charm for Lella, it is age appropriate, (she understands what hapy/sad means), does not set unreachable goals and it is visual, she can see how her behaviour affects people. The surprise is not expensive things, sometimes it is a sweet, or lipbalm, or sometimes it is just a fun activity we will do at home. Another idea  is to have a surprise box with small, inexpensive things like bubbles, special pens, stickers etc in and the child can choose an item (will try that soon). For older kids you can set a weekly goal and have a big treat like going to the movies or park.

We have tried the chart where the princess moves up the stairs to the castles when you are good and down when naughty, and when you reach the castle you also get a surprise. This did not work for Lella, maybe it was because she did not really understand it, I really don't know. 

So we tried the Time-Out corner, which did not work for her, she just can't sit still! 

Taking away priveledges is another method for older kids, like tv/computer time, playstation play time etc. Unfortunately it won't work for us yet, because our girl does not have interest in these type of activities, worst will be to deny outside play, something to think about?

There are so many ways, tools and methods one can use, but what is working for you? Would love to hear your ideas, please share here or on the facebook page Teach me Mommy